So I'm a Snake, Who Cares?

A dwarf who threw the removed oak barrel lid on the floor licked his lips and picked up his beer mug.

Just as he was about to scoop up the ale,

Whoosh!

Something jumped out from inside the oak barrel.

It was a snake, soaked in beer.

A snake with scales as beautiful as crystal climbed onto the table where the food was placed.

Even the heavily drunk dwarves all froze.

No one immediately understood the current situation.

The snake, which had been in the oak barrel until just now, was spinning its head on the table, perhaps drunk.

One of the dwarves shouted.

"It's, it's snake liquor!"

That one word completely changed the atmosphere that had been stiff.

"Snake liquor!?"

"I've never had it before."

"You crazy bastards, puhahaha!"

The heavily drunk dwarves rushed to the oak barrel.

They called the ale that had contained the snake 'snake liquor' and started scooping it up recklessly.

For drunk men, being called a 'crazy bastard' is the highest praise.

They all did that crazy thing without exception.

They gulped down the beer that had just contained a snake.

"You eat too!"

Someone gave a chunk of ham to the snake.

When the snake obediently ate it, the dwarves' excitement reached its peak.

"Want to drink beer too!"

"Ssaak!"

The snake stuck its nose into the beer mug placed in front of it and drank the beer.

"Hahaha!"

"It drinks well!"

They started singing again, which had briefly stopped due to the snake's appearance.

"Drink snake liquor, ho! Do crazy things, ho!"

"Ssaak!"

"Even if we die abandoned in the depths of the mine! Ho!"

"Ssaak!"

The snake cried along with the 'ho!' chant.

Is this a dream or reality?

Are they seeing hallucinations because they're too drunk?

The dwarves laughed and scooped up beer.

The heat of the drinking party rose.

Eventually, even the heavy drinker dwarves became completely drunk.

"I, I can't feel my fingertips."

"My, my lips keep trembling."

Symptoms they had never experienced before no matter how much they drank started to appear.

Their limbs felt numb, and their lips spasmed, among other things.

These were symptoms that might occur when mildly poisoned by neurotoxins.

"Hahaha! Is it because it's snake liquor!"

"Puhahaha!"

But even that was treated like part of the drinking party's entertainment.

They repeatedly blacked out and regained consciousness.

"Rest for one beat! Rest for two beats! Rest for three more beats and one, two, three!"

At some point, they were singing like that.

The dwarves stood around the table, clapping and cheering for the snake.

Food and plates had all fallen to the floor, and the snake was dancing on the table.

"It dances well!"

Whether it should be called dancing or writhing, I'm not sure.

The watching dwarves put their arms around each other's shoulders and joined in the snake's dance moves.

Today, this drinking party was the only group in the pub.

The owner who had thrown them the whole oak barrel had gone to his room to rest.

The commotion became too severe, and finally, the owner came out with a broom to chase them away.

And he finally showed a normal reaction.

"S-Snake!"

There was a snake dancing on the table in his pub.

Moreover, it was undoubtedly an unusual-looking monster.

"Get away, shoo!"

"What are you doing to our friend!"

"You crazy bastard!"

When the owner pushed away the dwarf clinging to him, the drunk young man rolled on the floor.

The snake, though swaying its head, didn't run away.

The owner swung his broom at the snake.

Thwack, the snake should have been flung away, but...

Clang!

Instead, the broom was flung away.

The snake had swung its tail to knock away the broom.

The owner, flustered, swung the broom again.

Clang- Ting! Thwack!

He swung three times, but all three were deflected by the tail.

"Sss-sss-sss-sss."

Was it his victim mentality that made him feel like the snake was snickering?

"Puhahaha!"

"That's cool, cool."

The drunk dwarves shook their empty beer mugs and admired.

The snake, as if responding to that, proudly stretched its body.

"Hey, you bastards! Get out, all of you!"

The owner roared.

He too was once a renowned dwarf warrior.

There's no way a pub owner who deals with drunks every day would be weak.

He went into the kitchen to find a knife to kill the snake.

Chiring-

At that moment, someone entered the pub.

Neither the drunk customers nor the owner who had just gone to the kitchen to get a knife saw it.

"You damn bastards, still not gone!"

The owner, carrying a knife, came out panting and charged.

His swinging looked quite threatening, as if he couldn't see anything due to anger.

"Oh!"

The newly arrived customer exclaimed in surprise.

But the knife didn't stop.

==

'Oh, no! Mouth parry!'

I bit the incoming blade with my mouth.

I clenched my teeth, and with a crunch! the blade should have broken... but it didn't.

Ouch!

My teeth hurt!

Ugh!

I let go of the knife from my mouth and retched.

I barely managed to hold back from vomiting.

"Waaah."

"Ugh. Puhah!"

The dwarf drinking buddies I just made here laughed.

I almost threw up on the table.

It reminds me of my first drinking party after becoming an adult.

Strangely, the alcohol went down well at that time.

'It's amazing, I'm not drunk at all!' I said as I kept drinking soju and beer mixed together...

"You never cease to amaze me."

But I can't remember any more than that.

My head was spinning.

"I thought you were going to start fighting with the dwarves... I didn't expect you to drink together."

Yeah, yeah, it's good to get along with everyone.

I should clean up the table a bit too.

It seems we made quite a mess,

I'll use Basic Elemental Magic: Water...

No water comes out.

"Aaah!"

The other dwarves are fine, but.

That old dwarf seems to dislike me.

He swung his knife at me once again.

I'm sorry, I'll leave right away. Just let me clean up the table.

"What are you doing now!"

At that moment, a hooded dwarf tackled the owner.

He forcibly took away the knife and shouted.

"Isn't this too much for a speechless beast!"

"You, you are..."

The old man was flustered.

Then he said, as if wronged.

"These crazy bastards brought a snake into my pub!"

"It wasn't us... It jumped out of the oak barrel. This little friend."

"Oak barrel? Nonsense!"

The hooded man stopped them as they were about to bicker.

"I'll take it away."

Then he approaches me.

Who are you, and I'm not a speechless beast.

My newly made drinking buddies tried to stop him.

The power of frie-ndship!

"What are you...!"

My friend who was trying to stop the hooded man was startled.

After seeing the hooded man's face. He suddenly spat on the floor.

"Ugh, ruined the taste of alcohol."

Then he leaves the hooded man alone.

These traitors.

Is this all our relationship amounts to?

The hooded man grabbed me.

I tried to avoid it, but I was so dizzy that I just collapsed.

"It must have come in from outside. Poor thing."

"Saak."

I'm not pitiful, I came in on purpose.

He held me in his arms.

Then he left the tavern.

No one stopped us.

"Let's go to my house for now."

The dwarf gently stroked me.

This kidnapper...

We entered an unpopulated area where other dwarves couldn't be seen.

He took off his hood.

The dwarf's face was revealed in my blurry vision.

"Sa, saak!"

I was shocked.

When you think of dwarves, they all have bushy beards. Even female dwarves.

But the dwarf in front of me was different.

Looking gentle, he had no hair on his face except for a bit of eyebrows.

His head and beard were smooth.

"A hairless dwarf..."

Pelerian muttered in bewilderment.

And that dwarf said with a bitter smile,

"You're bald like me too."

What did you say!

The dwarf was feeling a misplaced sense of camaraderie with me.

"We're in similar situations."

I felt wronged.

I'm not bald, I'm sleek.